Do not ask me if I’m lonely
I will not know how to answer.
Mum said I came out her womb
screaming like I was wounded
until I was put in her arms.
Do not ask me if I'm lonely.
I get mad at time,
at times,
because it can’t give me any more of my childhood.
at times
all I can taste are the spaces,
sore between my broken teeth.
at times
I see old lovers under falling snow
in yellow summer dresses
looking like a warmer place to escape to.
Grandma says
its amazing what we keep in our brains,
some we want, some we don’t want.
And this
This is the darkest room inside me
I walk in, turn on the night
And watch what disappears.
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